


Just a Touch

by angelofthedetectivestardis



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Universe, Canon-Typical Behavior, Kinda..., Light Angst, M/M, POV Dean Winchester, declaration of feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-25
Updated: 2019-07-25
Packaged: 2020-07-09 22:08:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19895116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelofthedetectivestardis/pseuds/angelofthedetectivestardis
Summary: In the midst of preparing for the final battle against Chuck, Cas needs to let Dean know about something important.





	Just a Touch

**Author's Note:**

> I had this idea pop in my head when I couldn't fall asleep one night. I was thinking about the show ending (that day had been the first day they started filming s15) and thought about how they would make destiel canon, and I came up with this. Enjoy! :)

“So does everyone understand what they need to do?” Dean looked among his friends and family from across the map table. This is it. The final battle. The congregation nods with looks of either determination or uncertainty. Dean doesn’t blame the uncertain ones.

“Now, everybody has to be ready and in their respective positions within the next five hours. We cannot slip this up, okay? This is the last chance we’re gonna get to end Chuck. Is that understood?” More nods from everyone.

“Good. Well, good luck, everyone, and….thank you.” And that was the break. Rowena heads to the library to prepare the spell; Billie is off to the Empty; Cas and Jack prepare to go to Heaven; Sam and Dean get ready to drive to Stull Cemetery, back to where the world was supposed to end the first time.

Time is ticking, and Dean starts to head for the garage where he’ll drive his Baby one last time before the inevitable. He has no hope of coming back this time because this isn’t like before where God was on their side and the possibility of coming back was not completely impossible. God isn’t on their side anymore. Now that he thinks of it, he’s not sure if it was Chuck choosing sides, or if Chuck was milking his “favorite show” by bringing them back from the dead and repeating the same apocalypse with a different twist each time. Whatever it is, it doesn’t matter. Because Chuck is waiting for them at the same cemetery where he first lost both Sam and Adam to Hell all those years ago, and where they’re finally going to end this son of a bitch. They move quickly down the halls, while also double, triple, and quadruple checking everything they need before leaving. If they want to cast this spell by dusk, they need to focus, get to the cemetery soon, and make sure everybody is in position for the final battle.

Sam and Dean walk down the narrow hallways of the Bunker in silence, not wanting to say anything just yet before the end. They about reached the garage door when a loud voice startles them to a stop.

“Dean!” Dean turns and sees familiar blue eyes - Cas. Dean’s eyebrows furrow. There’s something wrong, something’s up.

“Cas, what’s up?” Is it Jack? Is Rowena missing an ingredient? Is there a hole in the plan?

Cas glances to and from Sam and Dean before settling his eyes on him.

“I need to speak to you about something. It won’t take long.”

His voice has a slight shake to it that only Dean can hear from being so close to him.

“Um okay, I’ll be in the car, Dean.” Sam opens the garage door.

“Hey!” Dean gets his keys out of his pocket and tosses it to Sam. “Start her up and make sure she’s got everything.”

Sam nods and enters the garage, keeping the door open for Dean and leaving him and Cas alone in the hallway.

“What’s wrong, Cas? Did something happen?”

Cas looks so unsure, casting his gaze on everything but Dean. This only worries Dean more. “You sure you want to do this, Dean?”

He can’t be serious. Dean let out a sigh of relief but also frustration. He rolls his eyes, “Really, Cas? You stopped me for this.”

“Dean, I refuse to let you be the sacrificial lamb. In my eyes, it looks like you’re not even trying to stay alive after this.”

Dean scoffs. “What do you want me to do? We are fighting _God_ , Cas. You of all people here should know of Chuck’s capabilities.”

“Yes, I know of Chuck’s capabilities, but I also know you and know that you are so quick to give yourself up for the greater good. And frankly, I’m rather done with your suicidal plans.”

“Well, _frankly_ , you don’t get a choice in this, Cas. It’s my life, and if I wanna go out by Heaven’s Almighty, then so be it. You’re not gonna choose what my fate is. I thought you would know that by now.”

The look on Cas’ face reminds him of the time when he found out about Dean’s plan to lock himself in the Ma’lak Box. It screams _I would smite you right now if I could for being so goddamn difficult._

“Well, if we’re done here…” Dean turns away from Cas and starts for the open garage door.

Cas grabs his left shoulder and forces Dean to face him again. Dean challenges Cas with his eyes, but the angel doesn’t look back defensively like what Dean thought he would. Instead, his gaze is soft. “No, there is something,” Cas sighs. “I do need to tell you something but I’m currently having some difficulty saying what it is.” Cas visibly gulps, seeming lost at how to put what he wants to say into words. Then he looks up into Dean’s eyes with something that closely resembles…longing? Or is it sadness? Dean isn’t completely sure. But then Cas moves his hand from his shoulder down to his hand, and it stays there.

Dean looks down and sees their hands together, not completely processing what is happening right now. Though, strangely enough, he doesn’t have the urge or the want to pull away. Cas tightens his grip on his hand. Dean looks up to see Cas already looking back at him. And there, he feels a bomb of understanding and enlightenment drop onto him. His jaw goes slack, and he feels his eyes slightly widen and his heart stop for a beat. “Oh…” Dean chastises himself for sounding so stupid, but Cas gives him a small smile and lets out a small chuckle. “Yeah.”

What does Dean say right now? I mean, he’s pretty sure that whatever Cas is trying to say to him, Dean reciprocates. But Dean isn’t the best with words, and he doesn’t want to screw up anything by saying the wrong words. He looks back down at their joined hands, and then and there, decides what he’s going to do. He tightens his grip on Cas’ hand and rubs his thumb on the angel’s hand. Dean hears Cas let out a sharp inhale at the gesture and looks up to meet Cas’ eyes. He feels himself mirroring the looks Cas had been giving him, sending him everything he can during the silent moment. He smiles. All these damn years of pining and longing being conveyed in just a few seconds.

Dean doesn’t want to think about how this is most likely the end of both of them. But he does. Yes, he doesn’t plan to survive this fight, but maybe he’ll fight just a bit harder to increase the very small likelihood of his survival knowing what he knows now. But right now, this might be the last time he’ll ever see his best friend, and goddammit, he’s going to make a chick flick moment out of this. Dean pulls his hand away from Cas’ grip and pulls the angel into a hug, hugging him with everything he’s got. He feels Cas tense at first at the sudden gesture but then he returns the embrace. Dean buries his head in the crook of Cas’ neck.

“Thank you,” Dean whispers into his neck, “for everything.”

Dean feels Cas’ grip tighten around him as they hold each other for just a couple more seconds before pulling away. Their eyes meet - he will never forget those eyes, not even in the afterlife - and Dean sends another look of reassurance and confidence to Cas. Cas gives him a small smile and a nod. Dean, at last, turns around and heads to Baby where Sam is already inside the car, has her started and has the garage gate opened and ready. A quick look at Sam shows that, with his look of sadness and pity, there is without a doubt that he saw his and Cas’ exchange. Sam, thankfully, stays silent when Dean climbs into the driver’s seat, and Dean pulls out of the garage without a word. He resists the urge to look back to see if Cas is still in the hallway. Dean had just got onto the highway when Sam decides to open his mouth.

“Dean.“ Dean hums a sound of acknowledgment. Sam pauses for second before saying, “Do you wanna talk about what happened back the-“

“No,” Dean doesn’t want to talk about it, especially now and _especially_ not with Sam.

“What?” Sam looks at him with a gaze that Dean can feel burning at the side of his face. “I just wanna know what the hell that wa-“

“I said _no_ , Sam!” Dean steps on the gas pedal, speeding to their destination and shutting Sam up. But it doesn’t stop Sam from sending those pitiful looks at him and his white-knuckled fists around the steering wheel. He feels bad for raising his voice at his brother; he doesn’t even know why he was so snappy, but right now isn’t the time to sort out Dean’s love life. He asks Sam to relay the plan to him again to break the tension within the small confinements of the Impala. He doesn’t want their eleventh hour to be filled with such tension between them just because Dean refuses to talk about what happened just half an hour ago. This way it puts both of them back in the game and makes them focus on the task at hand.

Dean needs to focus right now and can’t let his feelings distract him from this plan. It needs to work, it has to, and Dean would rather shoot himself now than let himself slip up because of wayward thoughts. He can think about blue eyes later when it’s all over.


End file.
